The Intimacy Paradox
Why Gossip Kills Connection and How to Build Real Bonds In my 26 years as a relationship expert, I’ve witnessed countless attempts at connection. But recently, a scene in a local café crystallized a truth I’ve long observed: sometimes, our efforts to bond can actually push us further apart. Picture this: four new moms, babies […]
Stop Bickering and Immediately Improve Your Bond
Don’t Singlehandedly Kill Your Relationship “We bicker all the time, she’s so critical of me and I don’t feel like I am doing anything right. What should I do?” – Anthony, Boston Is your relationship not what it used to be? Over time, have you and your partner replaced locking loving gazes with looks of […]
How to Repair From a Fight
So You Can Truly Start Anew All couples fight, even happy ones. Some successful couples even have big arguments. But most couples DO NOT recover from a fight. Here’s a typical scene. Partner A gets upset. They express this to Partner B. Partner B defends and explains themselves. Partner A then feels unheard and re-explains […]
What Barbie Got Wrong
And It’s So Subtle There’s been so much hype around the Barbie movie. So far, it has earned over $1.34 billion worldwide. Wow! It is the biggest global earner for Warner Bros. ever, and the highest-grossing domestic movie of the year. Well done Greta Gerwig and Margot Robbie! So, with all the craze, I had […]
A Proven Way to Heal Shame
And Instantly Feel Better Many of my clients come from families where they were regularly criticized or shamed for doing something that their parents deemed “wrong” or “bad”. Parents would often explain that criticizing or shaming was how they “taught” their children to do better in life and not make the same mistakes. Unfortunately, parents […]
Why We Lie in Relationships
And We Do It a Lot Most of you may think that you are an honest person. But research shows that the average adult lies 1 to 2 times a day and is lied to 10 to 200 times a day. The ironic thing is, none of us want to be lied to, but all […]
Best Way to Prevent a Fight with Your Partner
And It’s Simple and Quick Are you tired of the endless cycles of fights between you and your partner where you end up feeling angry, deflated, and hopeless? Do you wish you could just stop fighting? Here’s one simple way to quickly defuse a situation before it escalates into a fight. Listen to Your Partner […]
How Negative Thinking Destroys Your Relationship
And What You Can Do About It Do your negative thoughts create self-fulfilling prophecies in your relationship? Do you often think of the worst-case scenario that causes unnecessary worry? You are not alone in this. The human brain is designed to look out for danger and protect itself. Negative thinking is our default setting. Because […]
Three Good Reasons to Have More Sex in Marriage
Why sex is good for you In the hustle and bustle of modern life, countless couples find themselves tangled in a web of responsibilities, leaving little time or energy for sexual intimacy that once defined their relationship. What was once a source of passion, desire, and excitement has now become a mere afterthought, or worse, […]
What is Attachment in Relationships?
5 Little Known Facts about Attachment Attachment is the buzz these days. Everyone seems to be an expert on the subject, teaching people about attachment styles and giving advice on how to develop healthier attachment. Some of the information is sound, but often, it is mixed with pop psychology trends, hearsay, and misinformation. Such misunderstandings […]
25 Lessons from 25 Years of Marriage
In honour of my 25th wedding anniversary This week marks my 25th wedding anniversary (32 years together with my husband). It means that I’ve spent more years of my life with my husband than without. Weird. And the years have whizzed by. It’s a miracle we made it to 25 years, and I don’t take […]
Do Healthy Relationships Have Problems?
Sure, but here’s what keeps them healthy. Many people believe that healthy relationships don’t have problems. The truth is, all relationships have problems because we are all imperfect humans. Moreover, all relationships go through periods of harmony and disharmony. But the difference between happy and healthy couples is this. They know the secret of going […]
Can an Unhealthy Relationship Become Healthy?
How to have a healthy relationship Is there hope for change if you’re in an unhealthy relationship? You may be at the end of your rope. You’ve tried talking things out with your partner, reading self-help books on relationships, and even attending counselling, but only to get the same result…the status quo. Most people try […]
How Secure Attachment Builds Resilience
Enhance Your Well-Being and Quality of Life So, what’s the big deal about secure attachment? “Attachment” has become a buzz word and everyone’s trying to figure out what kind of attachment they have. In general, humans have an innate need for secure attachment. That is, we have a need for consistent and responsive caregiving to […]
How Avoidant Attachment Harms Intimacy
Balancing Independence and Emotional Connection Do you love your partner but can’t truly feel close to them? Do you go through the motions in your relationship because you’re supposed to do certain things and not because you want to? Do you prefer to show love with acts of service rather than quality time or expressing […]
Anxious Attachment in Romantic Relationships
Recognizing and Overcoming Hypersensitivity Has anyone ever told you that you’re too sensitive? Or that you overthink things? Do you second guess your interactions with others, and afterwards, replay the scene over and over again with different versions of what you could have done differently? Do you overexplain to make sure people don’t misunderstand you […]